Socially Inadequate Me

2 p.m. on a Sunday afternoon. Delhi, hot, balmy and humid. What do you do when you step out to run some errands? You drop by the closest mall to hang out with friends. And end up buying extra T-shirts. Well, I imagine one can never have enough T-shirts or foot wear, although I try to curb myself from such instant gratification. Yet, I do fail miserably most of the times. The retail therapy works well for a bit and then I am laden with guilt. I should have never left home I think. Next time I will resist from making this folly I tell myself and then get a sinking feeling.

I am anything but fashion forward and I can never keep up with the latest hemlines or for that matter pretty much else. I almost have my signature style of being pragmatic in dressing and sometimes I am guilty of being repetitive too. Yes, most often I can be seen in the same kind of clothes for five consecutive things. Everywhere I look around I see people sauntering by in weekend clothes and marvel at the fact how can they look so fresh and dewy.while I look as if I just ran with Lalita Babar in a long distance race. Labels I fail to recall or even try to remember flashing in their Sunday happiness.

To augment this horror further the screaming advertising of plethora of beauty products keeps telling me what all beauty products are going to make me glow. I solemnly go to pick up a humble polish remover and the sales girl shows me the miraculous one which will keep my cuticle soft with Vitamin E she promises. I settle for the age old standard issued old friend in a familiar bottle. But another one offers me the latest range of something else. I follow the path of Kungfu Panda and wish I could tell her, "No thank you I am colourful enough and am glowing with inner peace", instead I tell her the truth, "I don't use such products" and feel quite out of the game. Then I look around and my inner glow not only dims it just pulls a fuse on me.

The mall is definitely not for me I agree as I am no social butterfly and I often feel like a fish out of water in these settings. The familiarity of the set up I agree makes it a convenient place to meet for us city dwellers, yet at many levels it is a bit trying too for socially awkward people like me. I believe I must be the only one who feels like that in this city of confident people. I for one will possibly never "fit in" with the trends of the modern world and remain quite stumped like Bridget Jones at many levels. Like her I quite eat my humble pie and sigh! Albeit with relief.

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